i have no idea how I got myself into it. Maybe it was like I wanted to see how far I can push myself at this age - i am swear my lungs will collapse before I hit 1km.
I have been making roses and roses - cutting out the shapes is the hard part. I still cannot get floral tape - I know it is there at Art Friend but it is so bloody far away. I think I will sneak away at lunch time tomorrow. I just got to have floral tape and yes, I need to blow some money on useless stuffs I buy that gather dust and mock me and my very short attention span. I have been flitting from one craft to another like a promiscuous butterfly. I have been meaning to start resin but it is so expensive it makes me want to bawl my heart out.
I so want to go home for Yaosang. I cannot remember when was the last time I was there. In fact, I cannot remember when was the last time I was in Imphal. It must be more than an year. Do I miss it? I don't know - it is like I have forced myself not to think anymore about the place I grew up, the place I want so much to pick itself up from the misery it wallows in now. But how can I forget the blue skies, the stars I loved to gaze on dark nights, the way time seems to crawl over there...how can I forget the river that runs past my house? How can I forget the soil that still clings to my roots that I have tried to uproot.. how can I ever forget...and how can I ever go back? I am now too much a slave to my needs to want to live there..but I so want the elf to spend at least one Yaosang there -
Well, he mailed, called up and I had to talk to him. How I hate the way he always is the better person...I could hold on to a tiff till I die I suppose because I am the kind who will deny themselves the good things in life just because ... I don't know what I am writing about....
I need to sleep...
