one last post

..just could not resist cribbing one last time before this year ends.

OK, so one more year gone..makes you wonder why anyone bothered to have this whole concept of year (i know, i know but please, please let me let off my steam at something)..And now, there will be fireworks and drinks and drunks all welcoming another year that will only bring misery to people like me who just cannot open their eyes to the good things in their life but will continue counting their woes.

i am working from home and getting paid in pounds - heck, i deserve at least something to smile about, not that getting paid for slogging your ass off is not something to smile about. Maybe it is since i do not slog my ass but still manage to get the work of two people done. Yes, i am so low that i am actually blowing my trumpet because there is nobody else to do it for me. i don't even know what i am writing.

For someone who used to fall asleep when her head hits the pillow, i find i am awake for what seems like ages before sleep claims me. Which is so fucking irritating. Yes, i am swearing. My mouth, my blog - i will sully them when i like. God, what is wrong with me? Anyways, i hate it when i find i am awake when i would rather be in dreamland because that is the only time when i can escape life's cruelty. Is life cruel or do i make it cruel? Oh shut up, not on the last day of the year. Stop being such a psuedo philosopher and just be the bitch you are. Yes, i am talking to myself. Please shoot me.

i realised that there is something therapeutic about scrubbing the toilet. Yes. And as i furiously scrubbed, i thought of how more meaningful my life would have been if i had become a municipal sweeper or a public toilet cleaner. i mean, i would have really done something that would have made a difference to lives - clean toilets and roads. Just imagine. i think i would have been happier doing something menial instead of being stuck with a label of software consultant or whatever crap designation they foist on you. i wish to God i had less brain and more patience.

i need to cut my hair again - he loves it long but i hate looking after long hair - just once in my life did i get it to grow shoulder length. Never after that. And i will dye my hair mahogany this time in the hope that i become a tree. What crap do i write???

And i went to the market wearing mismatched sandals - one pink and one purple. Not intentionally. No one seemed to have noticed. Maybe they were too caught up with my uncombed hair to gaze down. What next?

Actually, i am having withdrawal symptoms for not having had my dose of jalebis.Blame this year-end ranting on sugar deprivation.

To another day that will end up just like today.