broken.....

Dreams of a future together
Dissolve into tears
Leaving an empty shell behind
i have lost
And i am lost
To wake up to another day without you
To end another day without love

She is back

Back. After a long time. Was too busy tying up loose ends to gather my thoughts.

The tournament was, well, enjoyable. We won one game and managed to lose two! And i still have my nazuk arms burned shades of dark brown to show for it just because i had to get up at 6 in the morning and could not find the sunscreen lotion. i am looking forward to the next season where, hopefully, i will be able to score runs galore.

We had a barbecue party last Friday at a client's place. Since we had to fix some more bugs, we could not leave on time. We were the last to get there and had to do with the little food that was left. The house. God, the house. We were all awestruck. It had an awesome view of the bay, a big swimming pool, a patio where i could have sat all day long and a kitchen fitted with everything, well almost everything, you could have asked for. i could go on and on, singing paeans of that house.

After a flurry of shopping, packing and unpacking, i finally managed to take the flight home. Since i always over-shop( if there is a word like that) before going back, i was stuck with two suitcases bigger and heavier than i. Since i cannot pack (i usually dump everything in the suitcase, close it and claim i have packed!), one of my friends did it for me. He is meticulous about packing, with the result that everything managed to be packed and stay packed. But the main problem always being the weight (the weight limit is just 32 kg per bag), we weighed and re-weighed and found out that it was like way over weight. i had leave behind another big suitcase crammed with all my stuffs, books and candles.

The flight was, as usual, tiring. Nth hours or so of just sitting there in that cramped seat is enough to make anyone crappy. Then there was the halt at Singapore - 9 hours. Good thing that Changi airport is one of the best airports ever. i chose a cozy corner, shaded by bamboo (yes, i jest not) and finished a book. i managed to get myself interested enough to go shopping for chocolates and knick-knacks. And landed here on a steamy night. And here i am, trying to get myself back into the groove. Amen.

Pre tournament jitters

Preparing for the tournament. Cleaned my cleats. i thought of washing them but decided to take the short way out. So i sprayed windex on them and wiped them off with the kitchen towel!! Hee hee...

i am taking chips for the barbecue lunch party. But we have decided to go and sneak away for lunch as i cannot stomach the "delicacies" on the menu - beans (yuck), potato salad et al. i have this mental block when it comes to food. Isn't that hypocritical when i profess to be some wannabe gourmet who wants to sample all the delicacies this world has to offer? Whatever...

i need to get up at 7 tomorrow because we are to be on the field at 7:30. Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeekkkkss....i think when i go in to bat/strike, i would be half-asleep. They say it is going to be blistering hot tomorrow so there is a chance that we just might get dehydrated and pass out on the field. Won't that be fun?

i am sure to get over-enthusiastic and start shouting and jumping all over the place. But girl, remember the motto - fun. Fun..fun...and more fun.

taking a break

i have not touched a book for 4 days now. And that speaks volumes about the somnambulistic life i am leading right now. i am hanging on to my sanity by the skin of my teeth. If i manage to stay alive till this whole project gets through, i will treat myself to …..umm…how should i indulge myself? i will buy myself all of Maugham’s books i can lay my eyes on.

i got complimented twice – my shirt actually. i was in a lousy mood in the morning when i got into the lift. The guy next to me said “Nice shirt – it is so colourful”. You would have thought i was wearing a rainbow! i went to the kitchen to get myself a cup of tea and there was this guy who gave me this bright smile and he went “nice shirt” too. When your spirits are in the dumps, it sure feels nice when you get compliments. i must be sinking really low if i start feeling like i need a compliment to lift my sagging spirits.

The softball tournament is this Saturday. But i don’t have time to be excited about it. It will start from 8 in the morning. Imagine. That is like midnight for me. i have to get my cleats cleaned. They look like i have walked across the Sahara desert in them.

Half asleep

i can hardly keep my eyes open. And my code does not seem to be working. Does it make sense to code when you are half asleep? But i need to get this done by friday and QA has been hounding us.
...
.......
My code is working now. Off to bed i go.

Bug control

Bugs. Everywhere. i might as well buy myself a bottle of pesticide and go about spraying the code. That is what happens in a big project - something like too many cooks spoiling the broth. i cannot test my code without stumbling every step and trying to figure out and fix other people's bugs. To top the cake, QA has started testing. Now we can expect them to breathe fire down our backs. And some of the developers are on leave. How much better can this get?! i could rave and rant but what would that achieve? So here i am on a friday night, squashing bugs beneath my dainty feet.

i love NCIS. i love all crime related serials - CSI, Law and order etc etc. Does that indicate something about my state of mind? But i love cartoons and animation movies too. So maybe i am just a psycho with an infantile sense of humour. You know, i think this bug hunting has got to me. i am spouting inanities.

Cycling to tea

We invited ourselves to tea to one our of collegaues's place. We are so shameless but then, who cares? So we rode to the indian store, bought samosas and then cycled to their place. We had tea and bitched, ok, ok, let me rephrase that, we gossiped. Bitching is fun sometimes, maybe all the time.

Just a couple of more weeks over here. i miss home. i miss the crowd and dust. i am well aware of the sea of opportunities i can drown in over here, of the things i can do over here that i would find tough, if not impossible over there. i want to hoard enough dough so that i can give up this 9-to-6 life and well, live life my way. Sometimes i think i have too many dreams inside me.But then, i would rather be pregnant with dreams than be barren of dreams. i will give myself some couple of years over here. Live some of my dreams over here before i move on. To another dream, another place, another life.

And yes, quails definitely taste better than chicken. Way better.

oh oh oh

Middle of the week. Cooking quails. i have never tasted quails before. i guess it would taste like chicken or maybe better. Will find out before the night ends.

Today was the last game of the league. And we lost in the last inning, yet again. It is becoming an irritating habit - losing, i mean. i cheered so much - shouted my lungs out that some of the guys in the opposing team were so amused. One of my team mates told me he wanted to win it for us because of the cheering! Maybe i should have been a cheerleader. The tournament is next saturday. i am all geared.

i baked a cheese butter pound cake yesterday. It turned out delicious. i am going to try making meat loaf next time.

i have started cycling. After about 10 years. It is fun. But i am still not ready to ride on the road next to those big bad cars. So i ride on the sidewalk. We are planning to go visit everyone riding bikes. Wouldn't that be fun?

We went downtown on saturday. Gypsy's day out. It turned out to be quite an adventure. We were to take the train to downtown and we missed it. It left the station just as we drove in. So we decided to take the bus rather than wait another hour for the next train. Since we never travel by bus, we didn't know which bus to take. So we boarded the first one that was destined for downtown. It turned out to be the kind that stops at every other street. And it took us all of two hours to reach downtown. Then we took the cable car, for which we had to stand in the queue for about half an hour. Then we hired one of the fishing-boat-turned-cruise boat which, so very conveniently for us, seated six. So there we were, six Indians playing tourists. The ride was manificient. It took us around Alcatraz and under the golden bridge.

i have to start shopping for going home. i haven't even composed my shopping list. i loathe shopping but do i even have a choice? Of course, i do. i always have a choice.

Did manage to finally turn the last page of "The Bourne Supremacy". It was good. i started Scott Turow's "Law of our fathers". But he disappointed me. The first few pages were enough to make me blench.