Back

I am back from Imphal after all the ceremonies. How fickle is the human mind ... although it still hurts, life continues even when such an important part of my life is gone ...you begin to realize how dispensable you are...Life will continue even when you are gone.

Maybe because I so wanted my father to have some relief from all his pain, his end was something I had wished for- does it sound so cruel?But when you see someone you love tossing and turning ,
in so much pain, stripped of his dignity to perform the daily rites we perform so thoughtlessly and easily you begin to wonder whether it is not cruel to wish him to stay on just so you do not want to lose your father. It was so tough to see the man always so enjoying life unable to even eat and wasting away slowly before your eyes. You begin to wish for his miseries to end, for him to sleep peacefully, to be in a better place.

At least, I got to hold his hands and tell him I love him, that he need not worry about my other
and my sisters and that I would always take care of them till I die..,

I am returning back to normal life but when I see his smiling face in the photos, a pain gnaws at my heart...my father, a man who stood by his principles even when he was alone on one side ith the world on another side, a man who taught me by exampe to have the guts to stick to what you feel is right...he did not live in vain.....

Baba, I miss you..I miss how you always provoked me just because you found it so endearing when i get angry and start grumbling, I miss how you always pampered me, how you used to be so proud of me and showed me off to your friends - how I hated it then but now, I wish you would call out my name..how you always find something for me to buy for you at the last moment....your childlike demands...

Oh baba, I love you....