Wednesday, April 16, 2008

RIP

it is over..She left for good. Death- you realise it is so final. One moment you are here, the next it is all over. And human grief is so transient. In a way, it was the best for her. It would have been selfish to wish her to stay on battling all the pain just so we could have the consolation that she was still with us.

i cried--silent tears mixed with sobs. And there were others not so close to her who wept out loud calling her name, asking her why she had to go.

There are some things i need to decide now. i need to shed some emotional baggage and move on in life. Life is calling out to me and i feel the need to answer this call.

i am so worn out - physically and emotionally. It is no fun having to deal with people who come to condole and end up interrogating you - i mean, what the fuck, it is as if it is a circus. They have no sense of privacy. i know they must be having a hell of a time gossiping about unresponsive me. i am so fucking tired of having to answer the same personal question everytime someone comes to visit. i wish i could just scream out loud the next time to just mind their own business. i hate it. i hate it all. i wish this would end soon and i could back to life as it was before.