check.. check...check-up

In the last 10 years, i have had 8 medical tests - those stupid mandatory tests you have to undergo before they let you travel outside. And i have not seen the reports or heard anything about the condition of my heart, chest, stool or urine. Ever. Which makes me think i must be very healthy!

i went for one today.

i hate these tests - for one thing i have to get up early and present myself to be prodded and poked and blood sucked out. i cannot understand why they have to insist on taking so much of my blood considering that i don't have much of it.

i don't like the gel they apply before they attach electrodes and monitor your heart or whatever else they monitor. i don't enjoy changing into those sacks which pass for gowns and look like some human drowning in a gown. i don't like them making me read out the letters or trying to make sure i can spot numbers hidden in colourful circles. i don't like drinking half a bottle of water and then squirming about ready to burst waiting for the USG.

And today, after they drew blood (fasting), they offered me a glass of glucose laden water. Damn. i was expecting sweet, milk, banana, egg...anything but a glass of glucose.

And it is funny how the GP always assumes that you being female they can just cross out the 'Do you smoke?'; 'Do you drink?' questions. i don't smoke (unless you count the one time i took a puff of a bidi when i was a kid - yes, i started early -or the one time i smoked grass in Univ) or drink. But hey, i would at least like to be asked.

i was told twice today that my Bengali is so good. Actually it was more like 'Tumi khub sundar bangla bollo' (You speak beautiful bengali) and i went my usual 'oh ekhane onek din hoye geche tai jonno'. The other day someone told me 'Tomar Bangla tah khub poriskar' (Your Bengali is very clear). It made me feel as if my speech was a stream, flowing clear! Hah! i think it is because they don't expect me to be able to understand a single word of Bengali and then i open my mouth and ask something simple like 'Bag tah ki ekhane rakhbo?' and they literally spin around and do a double take. But then i remember being just as unbelieving when non-manipuris speak Manipuri.

Oh yes, and i have gained weight. One kg to be precise. But the lady who took my weight asked me 'Oto roga keno?' (Why are you so thin?). She was a nice one - even help me get into an ugly green gown that made me look like a chinky caterpillar! Ha ha ha...

And we celebrated Meitei New Year today. Katla mach, eromba and salad. When it is your mother cooking, well, everything tastes good.