dreams..and dreams...

S is back. And now, i am back to the fighting, bitching, gossiping mode at work. Beats coding in silence with the iPod for company.

S is fast climbing up the corporate ladder – he is good at managing people, i grant him that but like i tell him, he is too political for my liking. There is a new project coming up and he wants me to jump ship and come over and manage it. Maybe it is time for me to leave my comfort zone. But then, i have very little patience and i am not at all good at being political. i am not ambitious at all – too laid back for my own good. i am more interested in hoarding books, picking up fights with him, nagging the juniors rather than climbing any kind of ladder. And i am too blunt – i would end up treading on many toes with my if-i-feel-it-i-have-to-say-it attitude.

Truth be told, this is not what i want to do in life – i know i am good at it and all that but still, this is not my calling. i am here for the money and yes, the challenge. Not that i dislike this job – i would not have stuck to it for years if i was not mentally satisfied. In fact, i love this project, am possessive of the application, the business. This job has given me financial independence, has seen to it that I fulfilled my dreams of hiking in the Grand Canyon..i would be heartbroken when i leave it.

But then, there is the call of the wild. There is this gypsy inside that refuses to be domesticated. i have to cross the Sahara, surf the sand dunes, watch the aurora borealis, go visit the Grand Canyon again and hike from the south to the north rim, i have to go sky diving again, i have to visit Africa……..i have to open my candle shop…So many dreams…So much to live for. So little to die for.