Monday, April 04, 2022

And so it ends…

 On a cloudy Monday morning, two people who took vows to be with each other for life signed a piece of paper that would bring them nearer to the end of the road. 

And we sipped tea and ate kelichana afterwards in ‘celebration’. It drizzled a bit as if our love, or whatever it was between us, cried. I would like to think we parted as friends. I would like to think we would always be there for each other no matter what paper we signed on.

‘I thought when my love for you died 

I would die

It is dead

Alone, most strangely, I live on’



Saturday, April 02, 2022

 ‘Tum itna jo muskura rahe ho

Kya gam he jisko chupa rahe ho’


In the light of the day

i hide away my tears

And put on my mask of gaiety

In the silence of the night

When the mask comes off

My tears keep me company


Friday, April 01, 2022

And just like that..

 I have no idea what the title means…i have been scrubbing toilet bowls, floors, clothes, utensils— anything that can be scrubbed to scrub away some of the hurt. There is something therapeutic about manual labour…

And i revisit the different philosophies i used to love. I think what has helped me through this difficult time is knowing that i do not have to react the way i am expected to react. Maybe that is the rebel in me…whatever it is, i hope to find some solace in the fact that he is happy, that he has gotten what he wanted and knowing that, one day, i will be able to look back at this and think i have handled it with grace (obviously, since i so lack in grace, the one time i have shown a trace of grace, i need to harp on it so that no one misses this!).

Life is life- it goes on even when you cry yourself to sleep, or act overtly cheerful so my dear ones would not see my pain. Every now and then, i escape to some corner so i can paint on my mask of cheerfulness. But i like to believe that whatever has happened, it is for the best. I did not have the courage to let go- but he did. I do not need to paint myself as the victim or him as the villain. 

Thursday, March 31, 2022

Morality

 I was trying to understand why my lack of anger was getting to me. I think it is because somewhere in my mind, i equate the lack of anger as condoning what he has done. But i do not condone it - on my moral compass, i find it repulsive. I would have thought the fact that i find it repulsive would make me angry. And in my head, i found myself judging him.

But as the thoughts swirled around, i found myself asking what is morality? Should i judge everyone by my moral compass or judge only my own actions? If i judge him by my moral compass, doesn’t it mean i am foisting my sense of morality on him? Maybe what is repulsive to me is justifiable on his moral compass? What do i get by judging his actions just because it hurt and repulsed me? The same deed when weighed on different moral scales would register different weights in terms of right and wrong. 

In the overall scheme of life, how does all this matter? Just because he chose to do something that i have never, even in my wildest dreams, thought he could do, should i condemn his character? Yes, i feel sad that he did not turn out to be the person i thought he was - but then, is it his fault if i thought him to be something he was not? If his love for me was not enough to have stopped him, is that my problem or his?

There is nothing like old fashioned heartbreak like this to turn one into a pseudo philosopher. 

Wednesday, March 30, 2022

Love or something like it

 Love. One word around which revolves so much joy and pain. When the one you love slams the door on your face, does your love shatter? Is love so ephemeral? Does love rely on it being reciprocated to thrive? Why cannot love be just by itself? Why does it have to be give and take?

I cannot find it in me to loathe him. I know there can never be that connection with him again. But i know i want him to be happy, i want to see him smile…and i think to myself, maybe that is what love is, this desire to protect him from any hurt, this desire to see a smile on his lips even if it is at the expense of my tears.

My hurt is my own. It does not have to take away from the love i feel for him, despite everything that has happened. And that is that…