Finally went to submit the visa application yesterday. Unlike the US visa, i did not have to put up with silly questions, just waited while a giggly female looked over the documents, took 200 bucks to keep me updated by SMS on the status and sent me off to get my biometrics done. Over in about 45 minutes.
Of course, finding the place was a bit tricky what with my non-existent geographical knowledge. i bravely tried to find the place in google maps, got confused even more if that was possible. But what is Kolkata without its kindhearted souls ever willing to guide lost damsels to obscure destinations?
Now have to wait till i get the visa stamped - if they don't reject it, that is. Got my ex-company to give me an offer to get my own visa so i would have to depend on his visa. They quoted a salary that was much higher than what i expected that for a moment i was flustered. Ummm....Thought i would not trust my ears and asked them to mail me the break-up of the components just to check i have heard them right. That was smart of me, eh? Like they keep telling you, get everything in writing.
There are many loose ends i need to tie up before i leave but as usual what do i do - nothing. And i will start rushing around at the last moment and get nothing done. i am so damn unreliable.
At times i don't want to leave but then i think of the good it would do for everyone -well, honey, money does matter. If it were not for the pounds, i will still be here. The things we do for money. The pain we buy for it. And in the end, it would not have been worth it. But still, i succumb....
Wednesday, March 30, 2011
Thursday, March 24, 2011
on why i don't drink...anything stronger than coffee that is...
.not because of religion as i am affiliated to none
..not because of society as i have broken almost all rules
...not because i am a good girl
....not because of health reasons
Maybe because i am too drunk on my own self to want to be intoxicated with anything else. Maybe because i hate to lose control. Maybe because i might end up skinny diving from the balcony into the cold river below..Or maybe just because i don't want to drink. Simple.
All of the above, however, is negated by my yet to be fulfilled desire to get stoned on LSD. Just once. Since the likelihood of my getting hold of LSD is as probable as say me getting the businesswoman of the year award, sigh, i will forever remain uncorrupted by spirits or drugs of the illicit kind. Such a pity. Mine was/is a nature that would have definitely lent itself well to being corrupted to the core. Very well, i have my lebu cha and orange juice to drown my sorrow in. If i were sorrow, i would like to drown in sweet, tangy citrus juice rather than piss-smelling wine. Chee, what stuff do i come up with? You go drink your glass of wine - red, white or whatever colour is in vogue while i go sleep before i start raining more drunk-sounding words.
..not because of society as i have broken almost all rules
...not because i am a good girl
....not because of health reasons
Maybe because i am too drunk on my own self to want to be intoxicated with anything else. Maybe because i hate to lose control. Maybe because i might end up skinny diving from the balcony into the cold river below..Or maybe just because i don't want to drink. Simple.
All of the above, however, is negated by my yet to be fulfilled desire to get stoned on LSD. Just once. Since the likelihood of my getting hold of LSD is as probable as say me getting the businesswoman of the year award, sigh, i will forever remain uncorrupted by spirits or drugs of the illicit kind. Such a pity. Mine was/is a nature that would have definitely lent itself well to being corrupted to the core. Very well, i have my lebu cha and orange juice to drown my sorrow in. If i were sorrow, i would like to drown in sweet, tangy citrus juice rather than piss-smelling wine. Chee, what stuff do i come up with? You go drink your glass of wine - red, white or whatever colour is in vogue while i go sleep before i start raining more drunk-sounding words.
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
The first step...
....Come April, i am going to take a hiatus from my job for two months. Just want and need a break. And maybe to explore the candle business idea a wee bit. i know my candles will sell - my over-confidence sometimes grates but bear with me.
Of course, it will pinch me giving up such a well paying job where i do not have to exercise my grey cells that much or slog. But money is not everything or so i tell myself. And if i could make this a success, i would be doing something i absolutely love and getting paid for it. What more could i ask for? well, more books?
As a first step, what do i do but get my pranner bondhu SM to present me two books on candle-making. He owes me my birthday gift from last year; till now i have not been able to think of anything i want - but when this idea germinated, i thought i would call in belated gifts! i know i am so shameless but who wants to be bashful when you can be shameless? The kind soul he is, he has bought those books. i can't wait to get them.
Now i need moulds and wax and dyes and scents and wicks and sealant and what-nots. i am actually getting a bit excited about this. OK, a lot excited.
You know, when i go shopping and i see candles selling i always think 'hell, i could make much better candles'. Maybe now, it is time to see how well i fare. Even if i fail, well, at least i would have tried to live one dream.
To the gypsy who wanted to be a chandler...may her candles sell!
Of course, it will pinch me giving up such a well paying job where i do not have to exercise my grey cells that much or slog. But money is not everything or so i tell myself. And if i could make this a success, i would be doing something i absolutely love and getting paid for it. What more could i ask for? well, more books?
As a first step, what do i do but get my pranner bondhu SM to present me two books on candle-making. He owes me my birthday gift from last year; till now i have not been able to think of anything i want - but when this idea germinated, i thought i would call in belated gifts! i know i am so shameless but who wants to be bashful when you can be shameless? The kind soul he is, he has bought those books. i can't wait to get them.
Now i need moulds and wax and dyes and scents and wicks and sealant and what-nots. i am actually getting a bit excited about this. OK, a lot excited.
You know, when i go shopping and i see candles selling i always think 'hell, i could make much better candles'. Maybe now, it is time to see how well i fare. Even if i fail, well, at least i would have tried to live one dream.
To the gypsy who wanted to be a chandler...may her candles sell!
a house for the gypsy...
When i first came to Calcutta, i found it stiffling. It was not just the heat and humidity but the apartments. Having always stayed in a big house with a huge courtyard and garden, i found the lack of space suffocating. That and the fact that all the doors were always closed! i can remember only one or two incidents when our house at Imphal was padlocked - otherwise the doors were open till we went off to sleep.
Of course, i cannot afford a house here - i would have to sell myself and all my sisters and cousins too. A flat, yes. A house complete with garden, no. Maybe if we buy a plot and construct our own house, maybe.
In the land of the gloomy weather, the two apartments that we have stayed in have been livable because of the french windows which give a sense of space. The one that we rent right now overlooks a river and it is refreshing view. Sometimes if i am lucky i can even see the swans with their cygnets.
i have had enough of living in apartments. i want to move to a house. But most of them seem to have tiny rooms and though the thought of a garden is tempting, i would hate to live in rooms where you would bump the wall if you so move to scratch your bums.
He hates the fact that i want everything - a house with big rooms AND garden AND en-suite AND within our meagre budget. ummm...
Maybe what i need is a caravan parked under the skies. Or maybe a reality pill. Or maybe just a house....
Of course, i cannot afford a house here - i would have to sell myself and all my sisters and cousins too. A flat, yes. A house complete with garden, no. Maybe if we buy a plot and construct our own house, maybe.
In the land of the gloomy weather, the two apartments that we have stayed in have been livable because of the french windows which give a sense of space. The one that we rent right now overlooks a river and it is refreshing view. Sometimes if i am lucky i can even see the swans with their cygnets.
i have had enough of living in apartments. i want to move to a house. But most of them seem to have tiny rooms and though the thought of a garden is tempting, i would hate to live in rooms where you would bump the wall if you so move to scratch your bums.
He hates the fact that i want everything - a house with big rooms AND garden AND en-suite AND within our meagre budget. ummm...
Maybe what i need is a caravan parked under the skies. Or maybe a reality pill. Or maybe just a house....
Sunday, March 20, 2011
on a sunday evening, thus my thoughts flow....
Drop by drop, life bleeds. i gather the drops in broken fragments of dreams where they breed the flies of discontent which feed on wounds i inflict on myself. Oozing pus of more discontent.
Stitch by stitch, life unravels. i pick up the threads and try to mend the holes of relations - of heart and blood.
One by one, death snuffs out loved ones. First the brother. Then the father. And you pray that you would never have to see another loved one lying on a bed, unaware of the passing of day or coming of night.
Post by post, i blog. Inane thoughts and laments of a wounded soul.
Stitch by stitch, life unravels. i pick up the threads and try to mend the holes of relations - of heart and blood.
One by one, death snuffs out loved ones. First the brother. Then the father. And you pray that you would never have to see another loved one lying on a bed, unaware of the passing of day or coming of night.
Post by post, i blog. Inane thoughts and laments of a wounded soul.
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